The Three Pillars of a Good Life: Faith, Family, and Friends by Jared Harding Wilson

What are the most important things needed to live a good life?

By Jared Harding Wilson

We all know the basics of survival: food, water, shelter. But surviving is not the same as living. When we look past the bare essentials and ask what it takes to live a truly good life, the answer becomes deeply personal.

For me, the prompt this morning brought me back to three essential pillars: Faith in God, Family, and Good Friends.

1. Faith in God: The Anchor of Hope

This world can be incredibly hard, stark, and dark. Just yesterday, my wife and I were talking about how easy it is to lose hope when you look at the state of the world. Without something bigger than ourselves, the question inevitably creeps in: Why go on?

Having faith in God provides the ultimate reason to keep going. Seeing the bigger picture brings everything else into focus. For me, knowing that I have a Heavenly Father, a Heavenly Mother, and a Savior, Jesus Christ, who love even me—is entirely life-changing.

What the Science Says:

Psychologists refer to this as “existential coherence.” Studies consistently show that individuals with a strong sense of spirituality or religious faith possess higher levels of psychological resilience. When hit by trauma or tragedy, faith acts as a cognitive buffer. It gives people a framework to process suffering, offering hope and meaning where logic falls short, which significantly lowers rates of depression and anxiety.

2. Family: The Complicated, Vital Connection

Family connections are vital, even when they are complicated. I’ve watched the complex dynamics in my own family for years. My father and his two living brothers aren’t close at all; they literally don’t talk or hang out, despite living in neighboring Western states. His sister passed away from cancer years ago, and they weren’t close either. I do hope their lack of connection changes.

My mother is one of seven sisters. She lost both of her brothers tragically—one in a horrible truck driving accident, and the other in the line of duty as a highway patrol officer, where a portion of the highway is now named after him as a memorial. Among the seven sisters, some don’t talk at all. My mom is only close with one now, having lost another sister just last year who she was very tight with.

As for me, I lost a brother to suicide in 2012. That grief is heavy, but it has also made the bonds with my surviving siblings incredibly tight. My sister in Minnesota, my brother here in Utah, and I talk or text every single week.

Family can also be a source of heartbreak. I have lost touch with a portion of my family due to my own faults and various misunderstandings. Because communication stopped, it remains unresolved. But I pray for reconciliation every day. In fact, a part of why I write this very blog is for them, hoping the words might reach across the gap. Despite the imperfections, family has been a connecting link of love that helps me live a good life.

What the Science Says:

The famous Harvard Study of Adult Development—the longest-running study on human happiness—tracked hundreds of men for over 80 years. The definitive conclusion? Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period. High-conflict environments are bad for our health, but having stable family attachments acts as a literal nervous system regulator, reducing chronic stress and lowering inflammation in the body.

3. Friends: The Chosen Treasure

For years, I didn’t really have friends. I had plenty of acquaintances from work or church, but we never hung out outside of those settings. Back then, I relied entirely on my first wife to be my end-all, be-all for that connection. That is a massive amount of pressure to put on one person.

Today, my life looks very different. It started getting even better when my wife came into my life—an incredible, compassionate, and deeply kind woman. One of the reasons I fell so hard for her was watching how fiercely she loves her own family and friends. Even when she looked at my past, she chose to accept and love me exactly as I am.

More than anything, I love the way she loves God; it is woven into everything she does and is the very core of who she is. She has this beautiful way of seeing me, and seeing other people, with pure grace. I could go on and on about her, but truly, she is my best friend.

Together, because of her heart and the community we’ve built, we are lucky enough to have a large circle of genuine, actual friends. We hang out, we share our lives, and they help us live good lives.

Through these friendships, doors have opened. Because of friends, I found a good job. Because of community, we have a great church where we feel deeply connected.

What the Science Says:

While we don’t choose our biological family, friendship is our chosen community, and it has a massive impact on longevity. Research shows that strong social connections are as important to your lifespan as quitting smoking or maintaining a healthy life. Close friendships trigger the release of oxytocin and dopamine (the “feel-good” hormones), which actively protect brain function as we age and reduce the risk of cognitive decline.

The Ultimate Wealth

Faith in God, Family, and Good Friends. These three are the ultimate treasures of my life. Everything else—the career, the stability, the sense of belonging—flows naturally from them. They don’t just make life easier; they make it healthy, meaningful, and genuinely good.

When the world gets dark, what are the pillars that keep you anchored? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below—what does a “good life” look like to you?