Is Social Media Killing Our Compassion? The Real Cost of Comparison by Jared Harding Wilson

by Jared Harding Wilson

In an age where our lives are lived through the lens of social media, we have become a society of chroniclers and comparisons. We track, we scroll, and we inevitably measure our “behind-the-scenes” against everyone else’s highlight reels. While these platforms can connect us, they also fuel a devastating culture of “better than” or “worse than.”

There are heartbreaking examples of this impact, such as the story of Madison Holleran, a talented Ivy League runner / athlete whose Instagram feed portrayed a perfect, vibrant life. Tragically, the pressure to maintain that image while struggling internally led to her suicide in 2014. Her story remains a stark reminder that the comparisons we make online are often based on a curated reality that doesn’t reflect the soul’s true condition.

The Myth of the “Better” Sinner

We often see people on social media use the mistakes of others to elevate themselves—a form of “power tripping” through moral superiority. We are quick to label a sin as “horrible” and cast the person out, focusing on condemnation rather than asking, “How can we help?”

The truth is that in the eyes of eternal law, the ground is level at the foot of the cross. We often forget that the Bible places gossip and pride in the same breath as the most grievous of sins. Paul writes in Romans 1:29-31 about those who are:

“…filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers [gossipers], backbiters, haters of God…”

If we make even one sin in life, we are technically imperfect. On our own, heaven would be out of reach. Whether we consider ourselves a “saint” or a “sinner,” we are literally all in the same boat: we are all imperfect, and we all face physical and spiritual death. So, who is better than who?

The Light That Reaches Every Depth

This is where the miracle of my Savior, Jesus Christ, changes everything. I love my Savior, Jesus Christ! I am eternally grateful for Him. I know that through Him all good things come. He is my Savior, my Friend, the Son of God, the Beloved Son, and the Light of the World.

One of the most miraculous things about Him is His eternal Atonement—the great sacrifice to save everyone, even me, from sin and death. No matter how far someone has fallen, or how much the world tries to push them down to feel “up,” Christ’s reach is longer. Elder Jeffrey R. Holland offered this beautiful assurance:

“It is not possible for you to sink lower than the light of Christ’s Atonement shines.”

(Reference: “The Laborers in the Vineyard,” Ensign or Liahona, May 2012)

Constant Worth in a World of Comparison

A powerful illustration of this was shared recently in General Conference by Sister Tamara W. Runia. She used a visual of her two hands: one representing our worth and the other representing our obedience. She explained that while our “obedience” hand might move up and down based on our daily choices, our “worth” hand is constant—it never moves. She taught:

“Your worth isn’t tied to obedience. Your worth is constant; it never changes. It was given to you by God… Your worth is always ‘great in the sight of God,’ no matter where your decisions have taken you.”

(Reference: “Your Repentance Doesn’t Burden Jesus Christ; It Brightens His Joy,” Liahona, May 2025)

The Power of a New Response

Even in the wake of the tragedy involving Madison Holleran, we see the choice before us. Sadly, some might still point the finger of shame, but beautifully, others chose a different path. Her family started the Madison Holleran Foundation to prevent suicide and assist those in crisis. They turned a story of comparison into a mission of compassion.

Why can’t we do that for everyone? And why can’t we do it now—before something horrible happens? We should be asking how we can help the person struggling and those affected by them, rather than pushing them down to feel superior.

Finding Our Way Back Together

We must stop the cycle of condemnation. As President Dieter F. Uchtdorf famously taught:

“This topic of judging others could actually be taught in a two-word sermon. When it comes to hating, gossiping, ignoring, ridiculing, holding grudges, or wanting to cause harm, please apply the following: Stop it!“

(Reference: “The Merciful Obtain Mercy,” Ensign or Liahona, May 2012)

Ultimately, our focus should not be on who is “better,” but on the One who makes us all whole. As Elder Neil L. Andersen reminded us:

“Jesus Christ is the center of our lives. He is the Great Physician of our souls. He is our Savior and our Redeemer.”

(Reference: “The Prophet of God,” Ensign or Liahona, May 2018)

I know that Jesus Christ is the Beloved Son. Because of His eternal Atonement, there is no mistake so dark that His light cannot reach it. If He is willing to reach for us in our darkest depths, surely we can reach for one another in ours.

When have you felt the Savior’s light reach you in a moment you thought was ‘too dark’? How can we collectively shift from a culture of comparison to one of ‘building bridges’ for those who are struggling? Would love to hear your comments below!

Image created through Gemini by Jared Harding Wilson. All rights reserved.